Feeling Down

While we are playing Warcraft or Mobile Legends, we would need to escape for a little while when we are short of blood. And if we force to keep going, our character is going to die for real.

In our life, there are certain events work in parallel. Likewise our emotion, sometimes it goes down really quick, where it does not feel the courage at all. For maybe it has been through too many battles lately.

We should know that it is when it needs a break. Give it time. Let ourselves maintain and earn back the energy that only time could fill up that missing part.

Keep pretending like everything is okay when it is not will not help any better, yet it backfires on the inside of us where it leaves us feeling broken even more. Soon or later, we are going to fall down.

It is okay to take a rest when we are exhausted. Sometime, we also need to hide ourselves behind our comfort wall so as to protect ourselves from any possible injuries. Do not feel guilty for it. Do not constraint ourselves on certain rules we may had set. It is always okay to break some of them sometimes. Do not feel bad to take another step when our energy comes back. Continue when we are ready.

Rainy Day

Hiding myself from rain in the building is boring. Waiting for the droplets disappear is like waiting for new season to come. Especially, it is really annoying when I have an appointment or to go somewhere urgent, yet I come to stuck in a place instead.

Except on that wet day, water from sky becomes more beautiful when it helps me getting chance to stay with certain people for a little longer. It is a pleasant when the sky seems to give me reason to linger a little more. That only question me if god is standing by my side. For this moment. For god knows my intention.

Wasn't I waiting for when the sky go clear so as to continue? to leave the building? Yet why does it seem I am disappointed when I know now I can finally go? I wonder if I wanted to reach the place anymore or just to be here? Maybe here with that person who I ever want conversations with. I want to know everything about him.

I am glad, at least he had shared me certain information of him which I know I could never find them on his Facebook or Instagram account. Or even on his Blog. I was secretly wish for more of this kind of occasion where I could learn more about him.

But who knows if he felt the same or not...

Relationship Status

Relationship Status is just a word or compound words. We use them to describe how two or more people would like to be called or identified together. Good or not good, we are the one who give the definition to our own status.

Some people call each other "Best Friend" just to show how close they are, yet they come to talk bad behind each other's back. Being jealous when one is getting better than one. Secretly attack the one they usually call bestie somehow.

Some still call one another "Husband or Wife", but they do not love each other anymore. They cheat their partner and make love with new people.

Some are in relationship, not with just one person, but with many people. They love having fun rather than having a serious one.

Some couple are not married, but they live and have child together. And they love each other so much.

Some consider themselves and their partner as friend, yet they are more then what anyone could ever imagine. They do not say I Love You, they do not call each other boyfriend or girlfriend, husband or wife, but they kiss. They sleep with each other, but they belong to no one.

Some relationship do not need to explain to or get verified from the whole world. We just need to keep it for ourselves. Just to be able to be aware of where we are, what we are doing, and what we had done is enough.

There are many types of relationship. And no one could ever understand it better than the ones who are working on it. It is really not our duty that we have to judge, to describe, to measure, or to give mark for anyone's personal life.

Hello, Love, Goodbye

Hello, Love, Goodbye - Philippine romance / 2019

We may not know until we once step in this path by our own. To fall in love with a person we know exactly he/she is going to leave. And yet we still insist to struggle. We know we can not change the fact the person is not going to stay, so to maintain that quality time we are holding as much as possible and make it the best as we can is the only choice we have and crave for. Make sure we are not wasting it even a second.

Tell you what, counting down the time at this circumstance is like waiting for when someone come up just to rip our heart to pieces. And all we do is to be willing to watch ours are being torn to part. And keep reminding ourselves "I can match those broken pieces and glue it after. Sooner or later, it is going to be recovered."

Whatever, which encounters are not going to end up saying goodbye? It is just in a short period or longer. Return or never. Feeling attached or detached.

Some people walk pass our line just to say hello and goodbye. Some cross ours and stick around for a period of time, build memories for us to remember, and leave.

There is also a quote say "Nothing is last forever. Forever is a lie. All we have is what's between hello and goodbye." - Unknown

Yes! Do not let the time rush us to do what we wish to do. Do not let our hesitation build up an empty room for us. Be brave enough to hold the brush and paint the color we covet for. When the time is ours, grab and squeeze it tight. Worth and appreciate every moment. Spread love, because hate is not worth remembering. Let LOVE stay between our HELLO and GOODBYE.

Memories Haunt

Is this called MEMORIES HAUNT?

To feel like our heart is tossed into the air whenever the person who left long ago suddenly appeared in our head. Seemingly, it was just happened a few days or minutes before, although it took place for ages.

To feel like we are losing our breath to realize that we are not going to see them again. This sounds dramatic, yet it was exactly occurred to us, when we could hardly breath because of the happy moment in the past kept drifting over nonstop. And we realize that we do not have the power to bring it up again.

To dream about their returning, and only to disappoint ourselves when we wake up knowing it was not truly happening. It kept waking us up many times a night, almost we could not sleep. It is definitely awkward! They killed our mood in day time is not enough, so they come up and haunt us in our dream too. For we can feel the agony twice.

To feel sad and pain when we go to place we used to be together with them, and now they were absent. We may linger to the place, for we see their picture is moving in front of us. The way they dress, walk, and smile. And the way we gazed at them like they were the only object there.

To keep hearing their phrases or voice, and sounds like it is new in our hear. We also remember how they pronounce words almost we can repeat those lines out in the same accent. Sometime, we even answered the call in our head out loud. And to only aware we were alone with ourselves now.

And if these are not called haunting, I do not know what haunting is, when their visiting scare us harder than ghost does.