When We Are Heartbroken

This photo was taken on August 19, 2015, the day after I broke up with my ex.

 

When someone breaks our heart, it must be really hurt already, so we should not hurt ourselves more than this, especially our physical. Love ourselves first! The person who comes into our life is just a bonus. We do not necessary to give them the power to make rain and storm in our life.

Do not cut our skin! Some people said they cut their skin so as to relief pain they are dealing with. But who come with this stupid idea? It helps us nothing, but it will  adds more discomfort to our current suffering. After that, we also need to deal with our long term scars.

Do not end our life! Who knows what will happen next? Perhaps, the best thing in life is coming along their way, and tomorrow is their arrival time. If we died already, how could we be able to welcome them to our life? Please wait for them!

Do not starve our stomach! Staving ourselves do not helps any better to our feeling, but to feel extra ache. Try to eat good food, for eating delicious food give us so much pleasure. We do not need to empty our stomach just to show the world that right now we are heartbroken. We can be heartbroken and getting well eat at the same time.

Do not blame ourselves! When someone cheat on us or leave us, it is not our fault, but it is theirs. If they are going to cheat, they will cheat. If they are going to leave, they will leave. No matter we blame ourselves for the decision they made for their life or beg them to stay, there will be no different. When their time comes, they will do what they are going to do anyway.

Instead of hurting ourselves even more, why not  trying to live better?

Our parents did not gave birth to us for we can sabotage it now. But they aspire we could live a life as good as possible. So we should treat ourselves as well as our parents have always done for us. Do not disappoint them!

Remind ourselves; stay healthy, stay beautiful, and stay happy.

He Cheated on Me

Whenever I was in a relationship, I had always told my partner that if someday they did not love me anymore, or if they fell in love with someone new, please let me know. Just do not ignore me or lie. Then we could peacefully exit our relationship and still be friend. I did not want to have someone to hate, especially those I was one in love with.

Turned out to be different, I remember one of my exes was very cold. He cheated on me at mid of 2015. He was dating someone new while our connection was not broken yet. I saw their photos on Instagram. Perhaps this was the reason he did not come to see me like he used to and refused my visiting for weeks straight.

He denied when I showed him what I had found. He said I was trying to accuse him to made him sounded like he was a cheater or a bad person. Then we broke up on that day.

I felt bad for week, for I thought I was being unreasonable. I kept questioning myself why could I not trust him a little more? Did I mistakenly get him wrong? Was I overthinking? He did not seem to be that kind of person at all. He was a good son, he loved kids, he was a good friend to most of his friends too, and he was being so gentle with me at the beginning too. Did I miss out some part of the events? Or was I being too childish?

Soon enough after we broke up, he had his very best way to prove how foolish I was. He started to show up his new guy, the guy which I caught he was dating with the day before. I was stung! I felt the ache in my heart, the emptiness in my stomach. I wonder what had I done wrong that he had to do like this to me? Why could he not just let me know and leave instead of holding me on to bleed like that?

We all were already full grown people at that time. I did not see why we had to play with people's feeling. We could actually be just straightforward and honest with each other. To stay or to leave, just said it out.

Do not stand people up if we know we are not going to make it happen! Do not waste their time, and so is my time!

Cheetah

I heard that number 4 is a dead number

I think it's more likely a player

A handsome large cat killed 21 impalas

He keeps one alive although he does it fast

Oh! a kindhearted cheatah

Everyone said he has beautiful pattern on skin

I told them it was a trap, don't ever come in

They admire his strong legs when he runs

I know his honesty is weak, less than a month

They scream out they love his long tail

I warn them he loves it short, just like hell

Or he never does

Now they hate me, that last prey

For I don't thank him that day

He doesn't tear me

He doesn't chew me

He doesn't hurt them

He doesn't kill them

How about my 21 friends?

He is a cheetah

I call him cheatah

He wears white clothes

Long across his knees

He love cross sign

He minds only if it's tasty

I'm the 22nd impala

Run away from number 4 cheatah.